I'm a wife and a mom. Typical in many ways, but atypical in many more. You see I have 8 children. When my husband tells others this truth, they ask him why and feel sorry for his poor wife. When I tell others they tell me I must be supermom and other complimentary lines.
In this 2.1-child-per-family-one-boy,-one-girl,-.1-who-knows-what? world, we're kind of outsiders. Some might think I am nostalgic of the stories of my grandparents generation, trying to recreate the large families that my parents enjoyed. You'd be wrong. In fact, when I think of my grandmothers, I think they would be shaking their heads in disapproval of SO many children.
Because in our upside-down family it was my grandmothers who were modern women working outside the home, bringing home the bacon just like their husbands and keeping their families small intentionally.
My maternal grandmother was born in 1910 and married during the Great Depression. Everyone was poor, she had come from a large family that was extremely poor even before the depression. When she had babies, she made sure it was only 2 and they were 5 years apart. She didn't work because she was a feminist, she worked because she wanted her babies to go to college some day and have priveleges she didn't.
My paternal grandmother was born in 1900. She came from a wealthy family and became a teacher and married late and later inherited a lot of money. She had only one son, I believe, because she didn't want to spend a lot of time being a mom, she had lots of important things to do and more children would prevent her from doing them. She didn't work because she had to, or even because she was a feminist, it was simply what she wanted to do and nobody told her what she could and couldn't do. She liked teaching and that's what she would do.
My maternal grandmother died before I was married. I know the only reason she would shake her head at so many children is that she would be concerned they all got what they needed. They don't always get what they want, and don't always get what I want them to have or think would be good for them, but they always have what they need - God has provided abundantly.
My paternal grandmother lived to see our first child, whom she was thrilled with. She also learned I was expecting our second child and was horrified and told me "there are ways to prevent that (but your grandpa always took care of that)" What? LaLaLa, fingers in the ears, don't want to hear about grandma and grandpa's birth control, thank-you-very- much! She died before our second child was born, so I never heard her opinion of #3-8. She would be sad I was wasting so much of my life :-( and trying to convince us to move to her town and live near her like always.
So what's my point? Haven't got one. Just was thinking how backwards it seems to culture. In the 1930's and '40s when most women were staying home, having big families, my grandmothers were going against the grain. And now when most families have 2 children and most mothers work at least part-time, I'm a stay-at-home mom of a large brood. Maybe that explains my contrariness, it's in my genes - don't like public schools? -that's fine I'll teach 'em myself it can't be that hard. Don't like them hospital births? Home, Sweet Home for me. And my, these little things, children, they're not nearly so bad as everyone is always letting on. In fact, they keep life hopping, don't they? Let's rustle up a few more! :-)
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